"No," is not a word that comes up often at NASCAR merchandise brainstorming sessions. If you can think of it, someone is selling it. Tip of the hat to From The Marbles for alerting us to the existence of a few of these. Some people might say these products are ridiculous, but those people are no fun. I love these items. Now where can I get me some NASCAR bacon? 

 

 
If I had one of these, and an Ivan "Ironman" Stewart game in my house, I might never go outside.

Perfect for Mother's Day. Or classing up your kitty cat.

If I had one of these, and an Ivan "Ironman" Stewart game in my house, I might never go outside.

Scott Speed owns most of the above items.

These decals can also be applied to your washer and dryer.

Currently the 14th-best clam chowder on the market.

Warning: Will turn your baby super-gay.

This is the guitar Kyle Busch should have smashed.

This NASCAR romance book actually exists. These NASCAR romance books do not. Much to my dismay.

Trying to picture Kasey Kahne knives. Can't.

Insert skid mark joke here.

I could go for some NASCAR Deluxe Shells and Cheddar right now.

For the woman with great sports sense and zero fashion sense.

Chicharrones is Spanish for "Call 9-1-1 after eating."

Diversity program FAIL.

Perfect for all non-Jimmie Johnson fans.

Seriously, where can I find this?

Given the way the economy is headed, gold-plated NASCAR collectibles might soon be the only reliable currency.

Submitted without comment.

I don't see a top to those collectible mugs. Just sayin'.

Warning: Will turn your dog super-gay.

Warning: Will make the lighting in your room look super-gay.

Without this, no Danica Patrick. She stands on the shoulders of giants.

Surprisingly affordable.

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