Dale Earnhardt Jr. fans continue to rob our nation’s banks at an alarming rate. A man the San Diego News Network identifies as the "NASCAR bandit" has robbed three banks in San Diego, two of them while wearing a white-and-green baseball cap decorated with a Dale Earnhardt Jr. NASCAR logo and a red No. 88. For those of you keeping score, Earnhardt bandits have now struck in California, Georgia, Tennessee, New Jersey and Utah. And those are just the ones All Left Turns has learned about since last summer.
Why are Dale Junior fans robbing banks? It is possible they are not all Junior fans. Maybe the hat is just a clever distraction. Also, Junior is the most popular driver on the circuit, so his merchandise sells better than most, meaning there are more people out there with Junior hats than, say, Greg Biffle hats. Also, if these people are betting on Junior to win, many of them probably owe some shady characters big money. That’s the theory I am going with. Junior fans owe the mafia big cash and are robbing banks to pay off their debts. Until Junior wins again, we can only expect this rash of bank robberies to continue.
Godspeed, American banks.
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