NASCAR drivers know heat. Drivers don thermal firesuits to ride in cars with no air conditioning, except for their helmets, where track temperatures at midsummer races can reach 120 degrees. The strategies these drivers employ to beat the heat can be useful to fans as unprecedented heat waves have swept the nation. All along the east coast thermostats are rising faster than Kyle Busch’s speedometer in school zones. A few Southern cities have seen temperatures higher than Jeff Burton’s forehead during his frequent fever dreams (stemming from his scuffle with Busch last June).
Here are a few ideas from NASCAR drivers to help folks cool off when the temperatures start to rise.
Carl Edwards Says: Enjoy the AC in your brand new Ford
Carl Edwards has an easy plan anyone can use to beat the heat. Mention to your boss that you were causally chatting with the rival business about the AC in their building (in Carl’s case, he mentioned that Toyota has some great AC in their cars). Let it slip to the local papers that you absolutely don’t have a secret cooling contract in place (when the press ask ‘what secret cooling contract?’ you say, ‘I don’t know, because there isn’t a secret cooling contract, but isn’t odd that we’ve mentioned it three times now?’). Pretty soon your boss will be shelling out for a new AC for the next three years. A side benefit of this plan is how angry it makes Greg Biffle.
Kurt Busch’s Advice: Revel in the Heat
It’s been years since Kurt has this kind of heat. He spent some time at number one in the standings, won his first Sprint Cup road course and has been awarded Honorary Chairman of the Motorsports Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony this year. Kurt doesn’t want the heat to end… ever.
Red Bull Racing Suggests Moving Somewhere Less Hot
Let’s say you live in Dallas where it’s been over 100 degrees for forty straight days… Or you’re Red Bull Racing who has been racing Sprint Cup since 2007 with only one win to show for it. Rather than wait out the heat, just pack up and move somewhere cooler where snowboarding is really popular. What’s easier: cheering on Shaun White as he lands a Double McTwist 1260 or giving Kasey Kahne pep talks that ‘it’s just bad luck every week and things will turn around really soon.’
Jamie McMurray Suggests You Steer Clear from Heat
Jamie has done his best to simply avoid the heat this year. This seaons McMurray’s average finishing position is six places worse than his starting position. After some fantastic racing last season, Jamie has only one top ten in his last ten races. This summer when it gets hot, McMurray recommends cooling down by sliding to the back to let the draft of other cars cool you down.
Cool Off By Using Your Cold, Cold Heart like Brian France*
*(as told by the former Mrs. Brian France)
Brian France’s very public divorce is getting ready to eclipse the McCourts for "Messiest Public Divorce In Sports" and his abrasiveness in Jeremy Mayfield’s suspension demonstrated a lack of care for the drivers/employees in his steed. When the heat starts to rise, Brian France doesn’t worry because he can’t feel it in that cold, cold heart.