anonymous

Anonymous

BEST NASCAR PICKUP LINES

Posted 07/08/09 at 3:00 PM PDT by Chris M. | Email This |

How many times has this happened to you? You're at a party and a ridiculously hot girl in a tight black dress is talking about Robby Gordon.  You want to approach her, but you don't know what to say.  Now you will never go home alone again.  Just memorize these pickup lines and you will be on your way to becoming the ladies man you always knew you could be.

Number 5: "You want to help me find some buried treasure? Because Truex marks the spot." OR "You're so hot, if you were a movie I'd rate you Truex, Truex, Truex"
No one can resist the charm and grace of a Martin Truex Jr., and now you can capitalize on his mojo.  In order to reap the benefits of these can't-miss lines, you need to follow two simple steps.  Step one: Legally change your last name to "Truex." Step two: Prepare for non-stop lady action.  When you have a name like Truex, you're never at a loss for a good line.    

Number 4: "I'm Kasey Kahne"
If you use this line, it helps to be Kasey Kahne.  The success rate with this line drops off dramatically the more you don't look like Kasey Kahne.  That said, Kasey Kahne dates attractive women. If you can fool these women into thinking you're him, you've made it.  If you do fool a woman with this line, don't take her back to your messy studio apartment. She will discover the ruse. Park in front of a mansion, tell her it's your place, make out with her, then ask to go back to her place because Mark Martin is crashing at your pad and he goes to bed real early. Works every time.

Number 3: "I drive race cars"
Be careful with how you use this line because it will work, but in a monkey-paw-curse-kind-of-way.  As noted in the photo above, this line can backfire on you.  If you use the line around Paris Hilton she will go home with you - and a shower will not wash away the shame you feel afterward.

Number 2: "The voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you"
Warning: This should be used for pit crew members only.  Inferring that you are insane is a dangerous gamble when hitting on a girl, but if she's a gear head, you're in.  

Number 1: "We can continue arguing who has the best mustache in NASCAR ... over breakfast"
You will never go home alone with this chestnut in your back pocket.  Some girls might hate mustaches and some girls might hate NASCAR, but all girls love breakfast.  And that's how you hook them in.
 

Related links:

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7 Comments

Anonymous (not verified)6 months ago

I last longer than little E does on in a race!!
or
My Junior's track record doesn't have any DNF's!!

 
Joe Donatelli6 months ago

OK, that second one is pretty good.

GJP (not verified)7 months ago

Don't worry that your "toy" is running out. There's a battery near the backseat.

GJP (not verified)7 months ago

Ever tried it in the backseat of a car with no backseat?

GJP (not verified)7 months ago

The "Mile High Club" is nothing. You should join the "190 Mile per Hour Club."

Joe Donatelli8 months ago

How'd you like to meet Junior?

Anonymous8 months ago

Honey, you got my nuts tight.

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