Beating the best competition is hard; beating inexperienced competition is easy. Kyle Busch is carving out a niche for himself by losing big titles (he missed the Chase for the Cup) and winning against lesser-experienced racers (recent titles include Pensacola’s Snowball Derby and NASCAR’s Nationwide Series.) While he might not do everything it takes to win a Sprint Cup championship, he is gunning for several other titles. Here are five championships Kyle is gunning for in 2010:
Ben Franklin Middle School Soap Box Derby
This should be even easier than winning the San Bernardino County 200 (which Kyle won on Feb. 21, 2009). Kyle has ordered his team of NASCAR engineers to set aside modifying the No. 18 M&M car until they’ve completed work on his soap box derby racer. These middle school students offer very little competition, just the way Kyle likes it.
WNBA Slam Dunk Champion
Look out ladies of the Washington Mystics, Atlanta Dream and Phoenix Mercury. Kyle has his eye on the coveted WNBA Slam Dunk Title in 2010. He has passed up track testing at Talladega in order to improve his explosive hops.
Glen Ellen Retirement Home Shuffleboard Tournament
Those old folks won’t know what hit them. Kyle will be devoting a lot of his Sprint Cup practice time this off-season to perfecting his shuffleboard combination shots. Look for him to hoist the Shuffleboard Cup in 2010. It may be the only trophy he’ll hoist.
Daytona Beach Miss Tropicana Bikini Contest
After several consecutive third-place finishes, Kyle is hungry for the title. He may even skip the Daytona 500 this year if he reaches the finals of the bikini contest. Many people argue that he’ll never win because he is a man and he refuses to take off his fire suit for the contest. Kyle thinks those critics are just haters.
Travis County Blackberry Jam Contest
The ladies at the Travis County Jam Fair are a lot like Brian Vickers – always whining. Rather than find the proper fuel formula for next year’s superspeedway races, Kyle has asked his car chief to research flavorful blackberry jam recipes. While they may not win on the track, they will have a lovely spread of jams to choose from in the hauler.