At Talladega, the world got a rare glimpse inside the subdued, button-down, yet bristling volcano of Jeff Gordon’s rage. "The 48 has been testing my patience," Jeff Gordon calmly noted, "and it’s about reached its boiling point." With strong words like that, one might think Johnson had just pissed on his hauler.

There is no way to read the calm facade of NASCAR’s Most Popular Driver.  How can someone discern between Gordon’s ‘Boiling Point’ expression from his ‘Pepsi Tastes Great!’ expression?  Here is a handy guide to identify when Jeff Gordon is a drift in an ocean of rage.