KYLE BUSCH AND JOEY LOGANO GET RAW

Racing fights stink. Fat-free muffins are more fulfilling. So let’s hope NASCAR’s bad boy and boy wonder pick up some lessons from the good folks over at WWE.


Kyle Busch and Joey Logano are set to host Monday Night Raw. The show airs Monday at 9 PM ET on the USA Network.  Let’s get the obvious jokes out the way:

  • No, Brian Vickers won’t be forced to wrestle Busch and three other dudes with one arm tied behind his back.
  • No, Joey Logano’s dad won’t be in a cage match with Greg Biffle. Although that would be awesome.
  • Maybe, after the show, Busch and Logano will be able to tell us which sport is more scripted, NASCAR or pro wrestling.
  • 3,196: Number of sponsorship plugs.
  • 11: On a scale of 1-10, the "Spinal Tap" level of potential for awkward comedy. Just look at this awesome moment with Bob Barker.

 
In wrestling, there are good guys and bad guys, also called heels. Kyle Busch has to be heel. In fact, he reminds me a lot of the Honky Tonk Man.  Both win a lot, and both are great at breaking perfectly good guitars (go to about 3:00 for Honky’s clobbering of Randy Savage) .
 
 
 
That would make Joey Logano the good guy, or babyface. This should scare Joe Gibbs to death. Previous guests like Jeremy Piven, Snoop Dogg, Maria Menounos (you’re welcome) and Shaquille O’Neal have gotten physically active in the ring. There are toothpicks thicker than Logano. He might be wee, but here are a few reminders that you can’t fake gravity.