After a brief lull this fall, the NASCAR Fan Crime Spree has returned in all of its idiotic glory. Two mental midgets in Ocala, Fla., one of whom was wearing a dark M&Ms NASCAR jacket, recently stole a tin of cookies, some root beer and CDs from a man and a woman at gunpoint – only to lose possession of the gun to the man and woman. The robbers wanted cash, but this being Ocala, Fla., the robbery victims were smart enough to leave home without anything of value in their pockets. Judging by their actions, it might not have been the first time the victims (but really, who were the victims here?) stared down the barrel of a loaded gun. Per Ocala.com:
The couple told Ocala police they were at the Kangaroo gas station at Northeast 28th Street and Northeast Jacksonville Road when two men asked them for a ride to Ocala Place. They agreed. But once in the apartment parking lot, one of the men reportedly pulled out a silver handgun and demanded money. The gunman allegedly struck the man in the face with the gun.
The men then exited the vehicle and again demanded cash. The couple told police they gave them a tin of cookies, a root beer and CDs. During the exchange, a struggle ensued between the gunman and the male victim, who managed to wrestle the gun away and they drove off.
Officials were given a loaded .38 special.
Authorities say the men were both black, in their early 20s, and had short black hair. They say one is about 5 feet 6 to 5 feet 7, wearing a black jacket, white tennis shoes, and blue jeans shorts. The second suspect was roughly 6 feet tall, wearing a dark-colored M&M NASCAR jacket, and denim shorts.
I do believe that dark-colored M&M NASCAR jackets are worn by Kyle Busch (or zealous M&M) fans. I have no way of knowing whether or not the robber is a Busch fan, but for entertainment purposes, let’s all just agree that he is, and that Kyle Busch fans have joined the legion of Dale Earnhardt, Dale Earnhardt Jr., Rusty Wallace, Bobby Labonte and Clint Bowyer fans robbing and assaulting America with reckless abandon.
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