No race. No problem.

Kyle Busch didn’t just make history Saturday night in Bristol. He made me a winner.  Down a mere 105 fake dollars heading into the off week, I had two choices.

• Intense analysis that offers keen insight on the rest of the 2010 season.  
• Goofy prop bets that allow me to spend some time outside with the newborn.

Prop bets, here we come.

Odds a Roush Fenway Racing driver wins the 2010 Sprint Cup: 15/1

2010 has been a debacle for Jack Roush. They weren’t competitive the first half of 2010. Drivers were snippy. Crew chiefs were getting shuffled like cards at a poker tournament.  

Amazing what a new engine can do. Greg Biffle has been racing’s hottest driver, running near the lead pack in the last five races. Carl Edwards is fourth in the standings having never won a 2010 race. Matt Kenseth’s 2,512th crew chief could make a difference. David Ragan could wreck Jimmie Johnson. This entices me.

Odds Brad Keselowski gets punched in the face in 2010: 1/125,789,451,093

It’s not a matter of if. Just who and how soon.

Odds Paul Menard ruins Richard Childress Racing: 3/1

Childress had four cars in 2009. None made the Chase. Childress has three cars in 2010. Two will definitely make the Chase. The third car has a really good shot. I don’t care if they add Cal Naughton Jr. to the team, this idea seems dreadful.  And no disrespect to Mr. Menard, but I don’t see any shake and bake in his racing future.

Odds a current IRL driver wins a Sprint Cup race in the next five years: 1,534,950/1

Sam Hornish Jr. dominated open wheel racing. He can’t buy a competitive Sprint Cup race. Juan Montoya can win at ticking off other drivers. Danica Patrick can get lapped in the Nationwide Series. Couple that with recent IRL progress and we’re looking at two different flavors of ice cream that won’t mix together any time soon.

Odds Kasey Kahne never joins Hendrick Motorsports: 35/1

Hear me out. In 2011, Red Bull Racing will have two charismatic drivers who have made the Chase. This is the best shot an emerging team will have of establishing itself as an elite team. Drunk girls and shady dudes drink Red Bull in alarming quantities; so, we know money doesn’t seem to be an issue. If they pour gobs of resources into a successful team and provide Kahne with a host of new opportunities to woo the female fan base, what is to prevent him from staying put? A contract?  It’s racing.

On the other side of the coin, what if Kahne stinks like someone who has mixed Red Bull with too many ancillary beverages? Let’s say some hot shot emerges from the Nationwide Series or Danica Patrick brings guaranteed sponsorship dollars into a financially struggling sport.
 
Kahne will probably push Mark Martin to the proverbial glue far. But let’s hold our horses for just a second.

Odds this column is over: Off the board

If only I could place a wager. Have a great weekend everyone.