CARL EDWARDS WINS FISHING TOURNAMENT

OK, he didn't really win any fishing tournaments. Edwards was in Miami to promote Ford Championship Weekend at Miami-Homestead Speedway Nov. 19-22. He did this flip off an amphibious "Duck Tours" boat, one assumes, because he could. I'm all man, but check out this guy's body. Can you have abs on your back? Damn. (Check out video of the flip here.)The sordid tale of ESPN's Steve Phillips and his tubby temptress (Deadspin)Two convincing reasons for including Subaru in NASCAR (Jalopnik)Wi ...

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CHAD KNAUS’S BUCKET LIST

On Saturday crew chief Chad Knaus told Jimmie Johnson they had just completed "the biggest goal in my life" by sweeping qualifying, practice and the race at Lowe's Motor Speedway, giving the 48 a perfect weekend. Which begs the question: Has Knaus done it all? Are there any goals left for the three-time champion to accomplish? Moving forward, what will motivate the brightest mind in the Sprint Cup garage to attack every day with enthusiasm and vigor? A look at the man's bucket list rev ...

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CONGRATULATIONS TO RYAN NEWMAN AND JIMMIE JOHNSON ON THE BIRTH OF YOUR SON

It's impossible for two men to have a baby, you say? Fact: Ryan Newman is an engineer. Fact: Jimmie Johnson is a robot. Fact: This photo. Now it doesn't seem so impossible, does it?Fan loses game for home team (Break)Worst sucker punch in MMA history (Cage Potato)The Rivera spitball - did it happen? (Deadspin)The complete man code to choosing your favorite sports team (Asylum)6 great athletes who tried to kill their own legacies (Gunaxin)25 funny motivational posters (Holy Taco)Steven Seagal's r ...

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LOLNASCAR: SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND

 Hey, Kyle. LOLnascar has some advice. Duck.  Related links:The 28-year-old virginEstrada!Another boring raceUnlike Juan Pablo Montoya, All Left Turns is beloved in SacramentoKanye interrupts Montoya television interviewHot moob actionKasey's missing Bud girlsThe Junior faceObama brings change Jeff Gordon can believe inWhose show is it?'Mikey' Katharine GallagherGuitar heroStaring contestFind me lucky charmsDouble-file dolphin restartsI must break youNASCAR LOLZ ...

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NASCAR FAN HALL OF FAME INDUCTEES

With much fanfare and buffalo wings, NASCAR announced its inaugural class for the Fan Hall of Fame today.  The ceremony took place at the Hooters just off the Huntersville exit on I-77.  This under-anticipated event, sadly, was overshadowed by Wednesday's induction of the first NASCAR Hall of Fame class down the road in downtown Charlotte. Here are the 2009 Fan Hall of Fame inductees:   Rich Turkman of Daytona, Fla.Rich "Wolfman" Turkman established himself as a ...

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RACE ANNOUNCERS HEART JESSE MCCARTNEY

 The 20 best signs on pit road (Bleacher Report) We told you Jimmie Johnson was a robot; here is the proof (From the Marbles) Tour de FAIL (Break) 25 weird coffins (Holy Taco) Yeah, there's an MMA board game (Cage Potato) 7 movies not to watch if you're married (Screen Junkies) Get a waitress to go home with you (Made Man) You're not in Kansas anymore, January Jones (GQ) ...

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LOLNASCAR: THE 28-YEAR-OLD VIRGIN

Some of your finest work yet, LOLnascar. Related links:Estrada!Another boring raceUnlike Juan Pablo Montoya, All Left Turns is beloved in SacramentoKanye interrupts Montoya television interviewHot moob actionKasey's missing Bud girlsThe Junior faceObama brings change Jeff Gordon can believe inWhose show is it?'Mikey' Katharine GallagherGuitar heroStaring contestFind me lucky charmsDouble-file dolphin restartsI must break youNASCAR LOLZ ...

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ALL LEFT TURNS LIVE AT THE PEPSI 500

Notes, observations and other nonsense from All Left Turns writers Joe Donatelli and Chris M.’s trip to the Pepsi 500 at Auto Club Speedway on Sunday:- During the second verse of the National Anthem, we both thought, “That’s weird. The sound cut out.” But that’s not what happened. The sound didn’t cut out. Singer Jesse McCartney’s brain cut out. Guy missed the second verse of the National Anthem. Totally not a problem, as NASCAR fans tend not to be patri ...

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HOW TO SETTLE THE HAMLIN-KESELOWSKI FEUD

Brad Keselowski needs a hug.First NASCAR tells him not to race so hard against Chase drivers. Then Denny Hamlin says Keselowski isn’t man enough to have a face-to-face discussion regarding their little incident two weeks ago.  This needs to get settled. Here are three ways to do it. Cage MatchThink of the ratings of an MMA-inspired donnybrook. NASCAR fights usually stink, but this would be exciting. The sponsorship and charitable opportunities are through the roof. You could even d ...

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5 REASONS WHY KASEY KAHNE IS DOOMED

All is not well in the No. 9 garage. Kasey Kahne currently sits in second-to-last place in the Chase.  He got his first DNF of the season in the first Chase race and has been forced to use his backup engine because of concern that Dodge's latest engine (the R6) was built to break down.  All signs point to doomed. Check out these five reasons why Kasey Kahne is doomed to failure in this year's Chase.   1. Leadership mustache vacuumMark McArdle's departure as the team ...

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