AUTO CLUB 400 ODDS

Respect.It’s one of the more overused words in the language, abused by countless dopes who think they’ve earned more than they really have.Certain people talk about respect. Others sing about it. Odds makers document respect, along with a lack of it. Down a mere ten fake dollars after Kyle Busch’s win, their numbers for this week sure made me blink. Carl Edwards is for real:Last year, Vegas was slow to the plate on Denny Hamlin. It was only the back half of the season when H ...

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NASCAR PROP BETS DO NOT USE

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AAA 500 ODDS

What must Richard Petty be thinking under that awesome hat of his?When Clint Bowyer passed inspection at Talladega last week, I failed to win. Still, I’m up a fake 40 dollars heading into the final three races of the season.  My financial reality is far different than Petty’s. For one, I’m not betting real money Mr. IRS auditor who should be working right now. More importantly, any financial reality I have is a peanuts compared to the mountain of issues “The King&rdq ...

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TUMS FAST RELIEF 500

Slow and steady wins the race. That’s a hard sentence to write on a racing website, especially after two losses in a row have me down a fake 30 dollars heading into the final races of 2010. Still, slow and steady will win my personal race to pick winners every week. How do I know? Here are some kneejerk reactions from 2010, what we thought was going to happen and what actually occurred. NASCAR hosed Clint BowyerSure, it wasn’t cool for the NASCAR Mafia to dock Bowyer 150 poin ...

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PENNSYLVANIA 500 ODDS

Where is Jim Grey and the Boys and Girls Club when I need them?After picking up a 30/1 winner in the form of Jamie McMurray at Indianapolis last week, I’m down a mere 75 fake dollars in my quest to pick race winners every week. So I’ve decided to use the most clichéd sports parody of the last month and take my talents to Pocono, where I correctly picked Denny Hamlin to win earlier this year.Unlike that former Cavalier who won’t get mentioned in this column, I don’t ...

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COCA COLA 600 ODDS

Hello drawing board. I’ve been missing you. And like that stupid song on the radio, I need you now.After making fun of people who bet on all-star races, I bet on the Sprint Cup All Star-Race, stunningly lost (Jimmie Johnson got hosed, and I’m bitter) and now sit down a fake $350 as I bet every Sprint Cup race this year.This is why I sit back in front of the drawing board. Or more of a spreadsheet.   When the season began, we all made predictions about what we thought would ...

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SHOWTIME SOUTHERN 500 ODDS

Winston Churchill never saw a NASCAR race. But this leader’s advice helped me get off the schnide with Kyle Busch’s big win Saturday night. His quote of genius."The best way to take a look forward is to take a look back."Good stuff from a great man. I may still be down $320 of fake coin in my entertainment bonanza of picks this year, but I smell a comeback. And grilled meat. $15 on Jeff Gordon at 6/1: In the last eight races, Gordon has either finished or started in a to ...

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SUBWAY FRESH FIT 600 ODDS

Math is my frenemy.On one hand, math has me down a fake $200 in my quest to predict who will win races this season. On the other hand, math has me making bold predictions that could earn me gobs of fake cash. On the other hand, none of those bold predictions have worked. On the other hand, I’m optimistic.You know what…math probably sucks, but I’m sticking with it for this week’s picks at Phoenix, site of the Subway Fresh Fit 600. Trust me, you’ll be entertained. ...

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NASCAR PROP BETS, VERSION TWO

Denny Hamlin. Oh how you scorn me.I wrote a column putting money on him to win at Martinsville before the odds came out. Upon seeing those odds and hating them, I went in the other direction. Now Captain ACL has me down $200 in fake currency instead of being down less than $100 in fake moolah had I stuck with my original hunch. In an unrelated note, I hate this column and can’t be happy enough for an off week so I can present some random prop bets to drown my sorrow for a bit. Odds Kyle ...

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GOODY’S FAST PAIN RELIEF 500 ODDS

Now I know why Vegas is so fancy.For the first time this season, one of my picks actually won a race. As a result of my fake $50 wager, I won a fake $100 for a fake $50 profit. As I was bouncing around in a vibrant victory dance, my wife asked me a pointed yet appropriate question. “Didn’t you lose the first four races of the year?”Yes. Yes I did. One win and four losses still has me down a fake $150. But the feeling of winning certainly mutes the sorrow of loss. And it’s ...

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